Wednesday, June 8, 2011

THE QUIETNESS OF ALONE

I spent the entire day at home.  The entire day I went no where - no store, no errand, no office.  The only times I left my corner property was to run 3 miles this morning and then walk another couple with my husband as the day was slipping into darkness.  Once in awhile I actually crave a day of being alone - apart from the world.  Running this morning it was already about 85 degrees out.  I sought out shade and it dictated my route.  I mowed the lawn, tended to the garden, planted some landscaping plants, picked up the house, washed some windows, did some laundry, swept a few rooms and cleaned the bathroom (ok just a once over job for company!) and made dinner for my daughter and son-in-law who came to eat with us tonight.  There was nothing really spectacular about this day.  I did nothing out of the ordinary, nothing remarkable, really nothing noteworthy.  Yet, it was a magnificent day.  As I ran this morning, the day lay before me - a quietness of aloneness that I needed to recharge my internal batteries.  As I mowed the lawn my mind wandered, prayed, thought.  With every task I did there was just this quietness around me today which allowed rest and refreshment to my spirit.  I thought about people who mean the world to me today and spent time praying for their lives - asking God to bless them, grow them, give them rivers of ah hah ness that come from doing what we were designed to do, to change things in their lives, to bring peace and love to them.  I thanked God for all the things in my life that are good.  I thought back over the years seeing God's hand and letting loose of pieces of garbage in my head and heart.  I asked God to continue to help me to let go of regret and grief and embrace the present with eyes wide open always.  I asked for wisdom to know how to get to the things in my life that I seek to do.  I prayed for a meeting that my husband was in.  I prayed about his job.  I wondered while mowing back and forth in the yard where time has gone.  I thought about being 25 and then soon to be 45.  Would I wake some morning to find I am 65.  I thought about my parents and what it will be like without them on earth someday.  I prayed for my nieces who just graduated high school.  Looking down at my sweat soaked running tank top I wondered when people drove by if they were grossed out by how wet with sweat my shirt was!  As I stood at the kitchen counter to make a half of a turkey sandwich and nibble on carrots I laughed at how I love simplicity.  If someone were to ask me at that moment what one thing in life I really wanted, something that would make my heart soar, I would have to say once in awhile the quietness of alone.  It was an ordinary day wrapped in beautiful paper and a bow.  I slowly unwrapped it and enjoyed it all day.

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